See You Next Tuesday (Tea Party)

See You Next Tuesday is the Boomstick's first regular themed column. It features the week's most laughable idiots and scumbags for your reading pleasure. See previous editions here, here, and here

Happy Election Day!  Today's midterm elections are swarming with See You Next Tuesday candidates (pun). But the Rally to Restore Sanity this weekend inspired me to focus on the media and extremist politics. (A word on the rally - Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert descended on Washington Mall this weekend with a cry to "take it down a notch."  They lambasted the fear-mongering media and antagonistic Tea-Partiers for political hyperbole, and suggested that political activists instead carry "moderate" signs like, "I disagree with you, but I'm pretty sure you're not Hitler.")



So how appropriate was it that Monday morning after the rally, a story came out about a local Alaska media outlet being caught on tape scheming to undermine an Alaska senate candidate. K.T.V.A. reporters left a voicemail for Palin-backed Joe Miller, and apparently forgot to hang up.  In their accidental recording, reporters are heard trying to find a "child molester" among Miller's campaign staff, and saying,
FEMALE VOICE: We know that out of all the people that will show up tonight, at least one of them will be a registered sex offender.
[Laughter]
MALE REPORTER: You have to find that one person...
(Read the whole transcript here.) K.T.V.A. confirmed the authenticity of the statement, but says it was taken out of context. No duh! 
Miller, looking a bit like a child molester himself.
Miller's campaign is going all over the place with the garbled, but incriminating, recording.  So who's the See You Next Tuesday here?  The liberal media, for being unsportsmanlike and making all of Fox News' dreams come true?  Miller, for being a goody-goody tattle-teller?  Child molesters for making this whole thing possible?

I say it's Alaska itself, for being so damn boring that finding a sex offender in a candidate's audience is what makes juicy gossip. Where are your Spitzers, your Blagojevichs?  I'd even take another Christine O'Donnell (as long as you don't pull a Gawker and write about Miller's, a-hem, grooming habits).


Unexpected bonus of this story: Sarah Palin lashed out and called Alaska's media "corrupt bastards."  Watch out, K.T.V.A., you made Mama Grizzly angry.
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© 2015 by Alison

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